It’s been a couple of months now that I’ve been a dad. Fatherhood
hasn’t really sunk deep in me yet, probably coz my wife and kid are still at my
in-laws’ place, which limits me to meeting them only on weekends; and my demanding
professional priorities, which have been overriding my personal ones for the
last few weeks. I haven’t spent as many sleepless nights for my kid as my
in-laws have (building kind of guilt in me at times), but that only adds to the
void which makes me yearn for the weekend each day.
It was 6th of December and I had left early from
office, delegating all my office work for the coming week to my team. It was my
niece’s 4th birthday, and she was to become a “tai” (elder sister)
the next morning. A quick celebration was followed by our rush to the Deenanath
Mangeshkar hospital, where surgery was scheduled the following morning.
7th of December was the D day; the regular winter
chill was different for us that morning. We anxiously waited as Anuja was being
operated; my hunches said a “boy”, while my heart yearned for a “girl”. And
there it was, a pink little life wrapped in blue, the surgeon informed- it’s a
healthy baby boy. Our joy knew no bounds; what a feeling that is when you
witness life begetting another life. A part of you, a delicate one in flesh and
bones, that breathes life by itself and cries softly, with eyes, still tightly
closed and hands cuddled up to the chest, innocently searching the coziness of
a mother’s womb. You feel reborn, as a father this time, when you hold your kid
in your arms for the first time. At first you struggle, not letting yourself
disturb the tenderness that nature demands for a new born. You tend to touch the
tender hands and the soft feet, you wish it could open its eyes and respond to the
names you call it with. It’s that “awesome” moment when you practically feel
your prayers being answered and wishes being granted.
I’ve been visiting my in-laws every weekend since then; each
time I see changes in his features- chubbier cheeks, cleaner skin, wider eyes
and fairer glow. He looks at me with innocent and seemingly curious eyes, as if
trying to recognize or ask few questions, probably trying to relate with me as
a stranger with familiar voice. They say an infant recognizes the voice he’s
been hearing and the touch he’s been feeling ever since his senses develop during pregnancy. No wonder, he responds positively to classical
music that Anuja would hear frequently throughout her days.
My kid is growing up and is getting healthier by the day. He
senses the touch of a stranger and recognizes the hands he is comfortable in, consciously
defining the boundaries of his own comfort zone; at times he responds our words
with a sweet little innocent smile.
